3. The model of the parents with calm and considerate behavior

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Child education for more intelligence

3. The model of the parents with calm and considerate behavior is very, very important for an intelligence development

A family at table [3]. When parents can keep calm and circumspect, intelligence development of the children is not blocked

by Michael Palomino (2012)

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The model should act calmly and circumspectly during conflicts

Up to 12 years the parents are principally "all" for a child: Model, breadwinner, advisor, person for cuddling, play mate for some occasions, pacifier, referee, driver, teacher for domestic matters and school matter, sometimes also only a money bag etc. With all this it's absolutely important

-- that the parents are acting in a calm and circumspect way

-- that in important situations the parents also are present

-- that crises and conflicts will be solved without aggressions

-- that in situations when a balancing punishment is needed no violence is applied but some more persons are coming considering the case so the child can realize "by the superiority of the adults" that there was a wrong action

-- that when the problems seem to be insoluble the parents have to be capable to manage a distraction technique to distract the children to other topics waiting a solution for the insoluble problem evading any aggression in the family by this insoluble seeming problem

-- that the parents also have time for plays with their children.

Peaceful conflict management is the model
It's important that the parents will present their children the model how to solve conflicts in a peaceful tone, and it's important that children realize that conflicts also may be stated. Until the children are 8 or 9 years old they normally have no mental capacity to formulate conflicts in a precise way. Parents have to conclude from sayings or actions if there are conflicts for their children and where.

When children regularly see that conflicts can be solved in a soft but precise tone, and when children see that conflict situations can be solved in peace, then the development of the spirit is well developed (and not blocked), and then this peaceful behavior will be a very big model for the whole life of the child. and any aggression will be rejected in the coming life. Then, problems are also presented in a soft but precise tone, and in this way the child is learning to establish oneself when it's necessary, or also learns to get help. So, peaceful solutions of conflicts are "installed" in the children in their early childhood, and then during youth this precious pattern of behavior is coming out and flowering. To organize help in difficult situations is an important element for that.

Beaten and tortured children will get problems in their youth
When parents have the custom to be aggressive during conflicts and only are shouting or even beating and torturing, psychologically or physically, then this model will be copied one time, and this child will be in difficult situations during the youth because it never has learnt to solve conflicts in peace or in a certain way of tone establishing oneself by this, because the child never learnt to get help in certain situations. Therefore there will be youth meaning that they could solve all problems shouting, with weapons or with fast cars. This seed will come out "negatively", in rare cases also homicides can be possible when there are no other persons in life as a peaceful model correcting the souls of these abused children during their childhood and youth installing stable elements in the soul of these children which will be model in youth times. These important persons are teachers, good familiar members, or good masters etc.

Flexible education from 10 years on
From 10 years on the parents have to be more flexible. It's very important that the parents are not keeping like blockheads on their own lifestyle, and it's very important that a child is not downgraded only because it's beginning to take it's own decision in some cases in life.

It's very important that the parents of children from 10 years on are not arranging the children's room every day any more, but the child is allowed to decide where is put what, and is allowed in the children's room - when there is a children's room - is allowed to decide where which furniture is put - of course there will be always the warning of the parents that the child has to memory the place of the things and will find again all things - that means: The child has to learn to memorize where is put or where is cleaned up something etc. When children are parting a room, then correspondent agreements are needed between the children.

Speak about dangers in the children's room
With this the parents are encouraged to control what is going on in the children's room, but only when the children are in school. When something is coming out that is "not so pleasant" to the parents, this can be "addressed" again in a calm way for example with some humor and in an introduction sentence: "Hey, I have seen something. This was very interesting, but can be also a little bit dangerous."

Consider the basic values of a family
The basic values of a family life have to be considered with children from 10 years on. Parents have to be the model now when they did not act like this until that time. Otherwise the child will recognize what is illusion and reality with the parents, and the values of the child are also torn into doubt which can provoke a complete destabilization when there are no other stabilizing persons in the life of the child.

Children with restraining orders only have contact to TV and computer games
Migrating families (for example from Muslim countries migrating to Central Europe, but there are also racist German parents doing this) are prohibiting even the contact to other children. Such children are not only victim of torture, but they are also victim of psychological torture, and these children have hardly comparing possibilities, and these children are acting then how the "great man" in the TV film is acting, or they are acting like the star in the computer game.

Parents of migration families (for example from Muslim countries migrating to Central Europe, but there are also racist German parents doing this) these parents are not at all doing something good prohibiting contacts to other children. They provoke a shriveling of the children's curiosity meaning that Koran, school, TV or computer games would be enough for them. All other stimulating contacts are prohibited and therefore children's life is completely subordinated to Muslim family doctrine - or to German racist family doctrine etc.

And therefore there can be a high criminality of foreigners in Europe with mostly young Muslim men. So, there are the following factors provoking a youth criminality in immigration families: beating parents - prohibitions of contact - aggressive TV films - aggressive computer games. We see that two of these four factors - the aggressive TV films and the aggressive computer games - are coming from "Western" world. And this is really a cause to think about. "Western World" is producing a big part of violence in their society itself. Other children living in peaceful families and never having any prohibition of contact will say that the violence in TV or in computer games is "not causing anything". Well, this can be right, but there are also children where violence exists in their families, and intelligence development by the comparison of social organisms is missing, and with these children the violence in TV and in computer games has got a fatal effect.

At the same time Muslim parents have to know that comparing social organisms is a basic condition for intelligence development of a child, because this provokes safety and is giving possibilities to compare and possibilities for new conclusions. This also counts for other extremely religious families, for example "Christian" families, "Jewish Orthodox" families, or also "Hindu" families, and also racist European families. It's a children's right to compare social organisms drawing conclusions. That's why playing with other children and also visits in other houses should be allowed.

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[1] family on a table: http://www.travailsuisse.ch/de/taxonomy/term/15